That part of the world’s population waiting with bated breath beside their computer screens were no doubt shocked to their very marrow by the non-appearance. The rest of the world’s 7 billion people, however, somehow found the strength to carry on with… (Cont.)
I had a good time. It was awful, but I had a good time. The it in question was my performance at pool. I knew roughly how the game was supposed to be played. I had to use the stick thing to push a white ball toward one of the many… (C0nt.)
As last days go, I guess this one hasn’t been so bad. At least the sun shone and the weather was dry. I can’t deny it would have been nice had a stranger or two slapped… (Cont)
(NOTE: This post was originally written on March 7th.)
Amazingly, I haven’t done it yet. As I unlock the side gate to my apartment building after work each day, I look down at the drain grate directly beneath my feet and gulp. I know it’s… (Cont.)
A coin! A coin!
This was the thought that rushed excitedly through my head as I stood on the street corner waiting for the lights to change. But when I looked down and fixed my gaze on the small, circular shape I’d spotted with my peripheral vision, my dreams of quick financial gain were once again dashed. Instead of a shiny, gleaming and commercially exploitable metal token, all I found was a… (Continued)
The white plastic disk is much the same size and shape as a piece from an Othello board game, and is easily the most useless thing in there. Even as I type, I can see it out the corner of my eye, tucked between the stapler and the scissors, trying desperately not to be… (Continued)
I never thought much of flowers when I was a boy. Other than the occasional enhanced interrogation of a daisy for the purposes of gathering romantic intelligence, I had no real use for them. It wasn’t that I actively disliked them, but rather that I simply couldn’t… (continued)
Not a thing…
Not a single thing…
As I leaf through the pages, I find myself becoming increasingly alarmed. I can see nothing, not even page numbers. What on earth am I going to write about? It may sound as though I’m blaming my notebook here, but of course this would be a silly way to frame my problem. I’m actually blaming my notebooks. I have four of them and they’re all… (Continued)
How tough can it be to raise two kids? About twice as tough as raising one, right? Guess again. You see, when it comes to children, the normal laws of logic, space and time no longer apply. Raising two children is many times more difficult than raising one. How many times? No one is sure. Scientists have tried to measure it, but their instruments are simply not designed to withstand the withering levels of sarcasm involved in getting close enough to take readings.
Nevertheless, if (CONTINUED)
It’s the direction in which I’m least proficient and the one I think least often about. Perhaps it’s not surprising that I regard it a little differently from the rest. After all, compare it to the other directions. I often have occasion to move, say, left or right. The morning walk from my bedroom door to the bathroom would be impossible to survive without my ability to sidestep two frantic teenagers as they race up the hall one way with an undershirt over their head and then hop down it the other trying to put on a second sock.
Forward is very… (CONTINUED)